You the Man: A play responding to violence, a performance for our lives.

Sick of the headlines? Want to have a community response to domestic & sexual violence? Here’s what you need:

30 minutes.

1 Male Actor (or up to 6)

A well-lit stage or a room with a table and a few chairs. A minimal number of props such as a basketball, cell phone, lab coat, sunglasses…

And, a script.

You the Man has been seen by tens of thousands of people in the US, Australia–schools, colleges, universities, military campuses, conferences, churches, sporting clubs…

Will you bring the conversation about how to stop, interrupt, and prevent sexual and dating violence into your community? Will you share this play with others?

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View footage at

Why theatre? Because gets in through the heart and senses, under our skin, in our breath.

Why this play? Because it does not shame. It does not blame. It does not victimize. It does, however, hold all of us accountable, and it gives men and boys in particular models of men figuring out how to be allies.

Does it work? Yes. Longitudinal research has shown You the Man has the power of change and impact–immediately and continuing over time. It’s even been adapted for use in Australia.

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Cover Art: You the Man (c) 2018

What can we do right now that will make #MeToo become a noted movement in the past? What can we do to help young men navigate the idiotic and dangerous role-modeling? What can be done to help women, girls, and all people subjected to abuse of power–physical, sexual, emotional, financial–break free?

In 2001, when #MeToo was not a glimmer in anyone’s eye and # meant “pound” or “number”, I wrote You the Man. My stomach was sick with anxiety–this was a conversation people were not having.

And Yet. Nearly two decades later, I’m sick again. Because the backlash is all the stronger, all the uglier, and in lieu of powerful people being held accountable, we still need to find ways to interrupt violence, abuse of power, sexual predation.

Please. Get this script in the hands of advocates. Drama and theatre people. Church and youth groups. Hire an actor or just simply have a reading.

I’m sorry to say that when I moved to England four years ago, in spite of spending a good deal of time getting videos of the script together, I only managed to load the videos on to my YouTube channel–I did virtually NOTHING to promote the video clips of You the Man. But go on, now, they are there and ready. Please, watch clips of Brian Chamberlain and Lloyd Watts performing, or, you can even watch the entire show. 

Because, it’s true: there are no innocent bystanders. Because, people’s lives depend on all of us responding to violence, taking action, and changing the world.

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